Lt Marshal Varius played over the vox-transmission again. His whitening knuckles the only outward sign of the mounting rage within. That damnable greenskinned had the guile to demand his surrender. Surrender! A proud son of Auronis never surrendered! He would show that impudent little fungus that the only way its feeble little mind could understand!
"Colonel Pratus, how are events proceeding on Vitorinia?"
"Forces in the Southern Plains were decimated in the initial invasion, though sporadic resistance has been reported. Theater Command is feeding in penal forces to slow down the enemy advance before it hits the defences across the Acaris River."
"Ah good, we may wipe the scum from our ranks yet. How long till they reach the main line?"
"At current rate of advance... about 3 weeks"
"well no reason to hold our boys back then. I think its time we extended our control in this sector."
"What did you have in mind,sir?"
"The greenskins have made a critical mistake in revealing the location of their fleetbase, let us punish them for it. Ready the elite regiments and contact the Macbeth. I'm sure Fleet-Commander Hayase will be more than happy to get retribution on the beasts that are raiding her supply convoys"
"As you wish sir"
"Good. Colonel you are dismissed"
With a perfect salute Preatus filed from the room, leaving Varius to contemplate where on the wall to display the beasts head...
Showing posts with label Banter. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Banter. Show all posts
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Bazzak's Boast
+++INCOMING TRANSMISSION AT FREQUENCY 45.23, RECOGNIZED AS ANOMALY KNOWN AS "DA SHIP"+++
"Oi? 'Ow by da hand 'a Gork n' Mork do ya turn dis fing on? I already plugged da wotsit inta da gubbinz! 'Ang on, let's see 'ere...
RIGHT! Dis is da Warlord Bazzak! We've bin fightin' on da pretty green world for ages and it's bin a ruddy good scrap! Fing is, see, sum of da ladz are gettin' a bit bored wit fightin' you humie ladz, stickin' up the back and shootin' us wit ya 'urty las-gubbinz and not gettin' in good 'n close fer a nice punch-up. So, I was finkin', 'ow about youse humies...wot?
Wot's dis word? "Say-run-der?" Wot dat mean? We stop fighitn'?! Why would we do dat? Oh, roight! It a kunnin' plan!
Say-ren-dar! Yah! Say-ren-dar and da ladz an' me promise we leave your ladz alone 'til they out of da system. Den we take da pretty green world for ourselves, and you get ta go back ta yer big ship wit a few of yer ladz still alive! Hur hur hur! We be listenin' fer yer reply, but make it fast, otherwise I'm breakin' out da Kans and we finish dis once an' fer all! Den I can try ta krump dem spiky Eldars dat been takin' all my ladz, ruddy bastards!
"Oi? 'Ow by da hand 'a Gork n' Mork do ya turn dis fing on? I already plugged da wotsit inta da gubbinz! 'Ang on, let's see 'ere...
RIGHT! Dis is da Warlord Bazzak! We've bin fightin' on da pretty green world for ages and it's bin a ruddy good scrap! Fing is, see, sum of da ladz are gettin' a bit bored wit fightin' you humie ladz, stickin' up the back and shootin' us wit ya 'urty las-gubbinz and not gettin' in good 'n close fer a nice punch-up. So, I was finkin', 'ow about youse humies...wot?
Wot's dis word? "Say-run-der?" Wot dat mean? We stop fighitn'?! Why would we do dat? Oh, roight! It a kunnin' plan!
Say-ren-dar! Yah! Say-ren-dar and da ladz an' me promise we leave your ladz alone 'til they out of da system. Den we take da pretty green world for ourselves, and you get ta go back ta yer big ship wit a few of yer ladz still alive! Hur hur hur! We be listenin' fer yer reply, but make it fast, otherwise I'm breakin' out da Kans and we finish dis once an' fer all! Den I can try ta krump dem spiky Eldars dat been takin' all my ladz, ruddy bastards!
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